Friday, July 9, 2010

The day after tomorrow

It's over. It happened. I tweeted last night I wasn't sure if I was going to wake up tomorrow because reading Twitter I was fairly sure the end of the world was going to happen last night. Instead of an actual column, let's just get into the random thoughts going through my head.

1. This isn't a lock. As far as I know, the Heat only have four players under contract and one of them sucks. Really sucks. (And I went to KU so shut up.) We now have three guys who are used to running iso and screen rolls in the final five minutes of every game. Two of the guys essentially played the same position in the final minutes of the fourth quarter: Perimeter-slasher-one-on-one scorer. So it could blow up in their faces if their minds aren't right. It can blow up in their faces if they don't sign a big guy because right now Dwight Howard is licking his lips. BUT if there were a group of All-Stars that COULD do it, it's this group. This isn't Allen Iverson, Kobe Bryant and Shaq on the same team. How this works? Wade is the main "guy" so to speak. He averages 22 with five boards and throw in three or four assists. Bosh has to average about 19 and 10 (AKA "Gasol Numbers".) Then LeBron, stay with me, has to average about 15, 10 and nine. Hell he might have to average a triple-double. And call me crazy, but I think he might love this role. LeBron always seemed at his best with the Cavs in the first quarter, dishing to teammates, setting up shooters and then the occasional dive cut for a monster throw down. He never looked to take over the first quarter (unless he felt like it). Not surprisingly, the Cavs have had the best first quarter numbers in the league the past two years. Imagine if LeBron took that entire mindset for an entire game? It's scary.

2. Has Kobe Bryant ever had the biggest flip in the history of the league? Scott Carefoot lays it out perfectly. This new trifecta is now the most hated team the league outside of the South. Kobe is now the underdog, the Lakers aren't the overwhelming favorite. Could you imagine the scenario? It's finally Kobe vs. LeBron in the finals, but it isn't a fair fight. LeBron's got help. He's got two better players than anyone else on the Laker roster besides Kobe (Well Gasol vs Bosh is a coin flip.) Kobe, one of the most hated players in the league this decade, now has a chance to slay the Hydra, become the hero, tie Jordan for ring count and finally cement himself as the "guy who came closest" to becoming Jordan. Much better scenario than Lakers/Celtics for the 2390823rd time. Fantastic. And here's a fantastic quote from that Carefoot piece that drive it home for me:

"I’d like to think that Kobe watched LeBron’s announcement with his hands bridged under his chin in anticipation, and that his cold eyes narrowed and his lips curled into a thin smile when the decision was revealed. Say what you will about Kobe, but I guarantee you that he’s not afraid. On the contrary, he fully realizes how his legend will grow if he can conquer this three-headed beast."

3. Other than that scenario unfolding here are the others I hope happens:

-Cavs somehow scratch out an 8th seed and meet the Heat in the first round and beat them in six in Cleveland. It would be the ultimate saving grace moment for the city, the first time that disaster was immediately reprimanded. Then that leads to Shaq going to some club and signing "LeBron can't win a ring without me." (He'll work on the rhyming later.)

-The Mavericks beat the Heat in the Finals in six games with the Heat having home court after the Heat took a 2-0 series lead. This might be my favorite one because it knocks out so many things. A.) Dirk gets a title B.) MAVERICKS get a title C.) Dallas gets its first title since 1999 D.) Exact, symmetry revenge on the franchise and player that stole the last chance for Mavs to win it all. Show Wade and Miami how it feels to blow a lead in the Finals AND having to watch the team celebrate it on your court. Increase the choke job status of all three superstars. D.) Dirk wins a title. I seriously have goosebumps thinking if this happened. So good.

4. A lot of Facebook and Twitter had a lot of people denouncing the league and saying how they aren't big fans in the first place and this only makes it worse. Give. Me. A. Break. Are you kidding?! How is this not the most interesting season of the NBA since my 21 year conception. This is like 2004. Every one thought the Lakers were HANDED a title and they got smoked by an actual team. And tell me right now, this very minute that you aren't going to watch when Miami travels to Cleveland this year. Go head, tell me. Waits...taps foot...Yeah, that's what I thought. Every one and their Mom (including mine, drunk and all) is going to watch that game.

5. Cavs owner Dan Gilbert's letter might go down as the funniest thing in sports for a couple of reasons. 1.) It's the biggest hypocrite post of the year (I have him winning an ESPY for hypocrite of the year beating out LeBron, Tiger and Kobayashi.) So, wait, this guy quit on your team and is the worst person ever, but if LeBron said "Cleveland" instead of "South Beach" you would of let him run back into your arms and let him suck at your teat. Cry me a river. It's your fault LeBron is the egomaniacal monster. You gave all his friends jobs in the organization, gave his family rides on the team plane. You let him own the team instead of you. So don't try to look like the hero now. But then 2.) he has also endeavored himself to every Cleveland fan and LeBron hater in the country, because that letter is EXACTLY what every fan wanted/did say after Thursday night. And finally 3.) Comic-Sans...really? Writing a hate letter in Comic Sans is like trying to murder someone in a Hello Kitty costume. Hilarity at its finest.

That's all I got. I don't really know what's going to happen, but I do know one thing I've learned in these past two weeks.

Thank God for Dirk.

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